evocation | ⚡ hadriel

Holy shit, Rome.

[And she thought she was bad. So much for that braid, because Kyna is whipping her head around to look at him again.]

Did you actually want to kiss him or were you just saying it to make him feel better?

[It falls out of his fingers and he gives her kind of a hopeless look- that's about as expressive as he gets, so cherish it.]

I don't know. It's not something I'd thought about.

[Rome purses his lips in a frown.]

Maybe I was just attempting to placate him.

[Kyna lets out a long-suffering sigh, then turns around completely, reaching for his hands.]

Rome.

[Generally she freezes up when people ask her for advice, but this seems like easy mode. Is this how Harlan feels when she asks him how to deal with things?]

He's totally avoiding you because he knew you weren't into it and now his feelings are hurt or something.

[He sighs, letting Kyna grab at his hands. The braid is forgotten, it seems.]

Why would his feelings be hurt?

[Easy mode indeed.]

I don't even know why he'd do something like that in the first place.

[W o w.]

He did it because he has a crush on you or he just... you know, thinks you're hot. And you rejected him, so his feelings were hurt.

He should have just told me.

[He argues, confused.]

I don't- I've never had someone be... like that. Before.

What? Try to kiss you?

[Oh, Rome. She sighs, shrugging.]

Sometimes it's... hard to tell someone something like that.

Yes.

[It's not exactly surprising news. Rome was raised to be a police dog and nothing more- forming relationships with the other wolves in his platoon was, of course, strictly forbidden. Romance is messy- emotions are messy, and he's been conditioned away from them since he was old enough to walk.]

Should I apologize?

Uh... Man, I don't know. Are you into him?

Into...?

[There's a pause. Rome tilts his head at her, his brows furrowed, the mannerism a bit more canine than human.

When he does get what she's saying, he shakes his head, still confused.]

...no. I don't have the emotional capacity for romantic attraction.

Uh. Oookay.

[Kyna pats his hand, trying to process that statement. Let's... unpack that, then.]

Why?

I'm not human.

[He explains to her, slowly, as if she didn't get the message clearly enough the first time around. Haven't they already been over this?]

[She squints at him.]

A lot of people here aren't human. I need something better than that for that fucking nuke of a revelation.

Calm down.

[How is this a big deal? He frowns, unsure of how to really explain something that was always just taken for granted in his world.]

I just... function mentally at a lower level than humans, particularly emotionally. Complex emotions in other people are difficult for me to understand. I don't- feel things like guilt or anxiety or love.

I am calm. Don't tell me to calm down.

[God! She pokes at his side.]

Are you serious? That sounds like bullshit to me.

Of course I'm serious.

[He frowns, but doesn't move to stop her poking. Kyna, that's rude.]

I'm essentially part canine. It comes with certain limitations-my handler would be able to explain this better than I can.

Your handler? What handler? Wait, aren't you the same type of werewolf Morgan is?

[She has about eight thousand questions, but he's getting off with three at once for now.]

Yes and no.

[She's getting way more into this than he thought she would- the topic is now completely derailed and he pulls back a bit so he can explain more readily.]

Morgan was changed traumatically from a bite in his teens. His brain had already developed to the point where the secondary consciousness was seen as an addition to his own. In my case, the military altered me at my birth. I grew with and alongside it, as- well, not quite as one, but close enough that my mental development was heavily impacted.

[It's not that complicated! It's kind of that complicated.]

Anyway, my handler isn't here- he didn't arrive in Hadriel with me. I've been reporting to miss Maketh as something of a stand-in, but it's not quite the same.

[Well that... Sounds super not great. Kyna frowns.]

What does your handler even do? Why do you need one? And what do you mean, they altered you?

A handler and a wolf function as a unit together, [he explains calmly. How are they such close friend without her knowing all of this?] We share a rank. My handler controls my schedule, training, missions, and has complete authority. I need one because...

[Rome frowns a little.]

-well, I just explained it. I'm not as intelligent and I can't be trusted to make the right call in the heat of the moment. I don't have the morality or emotional grasp to make decisions that could affect the lives of others, and if I lost control, I would be a liability. My handler utilizes me as he sees fit, and I focus solely on completing the tasks laid out for me. It's what they intended when they altered me- when they injected me with the lycanthropy virus at birth.

[To answer her third question.]

All military wolves are wards of the state.

What? Are you serious? So they can just... tell you what to do and you have to do it without question? That's total bullshit.

[She's getting a little heated again.]

I bet that's all crap they told you, isn't it? About not having morality or intelligence or whatever. How do you even know that's true?

[Her instinct is to say it's not, not that she knows enough about the situation to prove it.]

They have no reason to lie.

[Well, this conversation took a turn for the unpleasant rather quickly.]

I'm not upset about it. It's just reality.

Okay, but are you happy with it? Do you just want to spend the rest of your life doing whatever someone else tells you?

I've never thought about it.

[Simple, and honest.]

Well, think about it now. Is that what you want for the rest of your life?

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