[ there's a pause when he realizes that he should probably expand on that. at that time, he had no other choice: evolve or die, break free or let everyone down, in his eyes, he couldn't not. it was everything up until that point, including his connections to all the people who had helped him despite his situation.
it takes him a moment to word it properly. ]
... Other people I knew gave me that power, they believed in me. If I didn't, the God of Control would've remade the world how he wanted. It was then or never.
[Kyna bites her lip, quiet for a moment, just studying him. She can't imagine how terrifying that must have been, for all his talk of rebellion and changing things for the better. Even if you believe in something, all that pressure must be overwhelming.]
[It makes her heart twist. She doesn't know how she's managed to fall in with so many people that make her feel so cared for and so irreplaceable, but she's not used to it. Ren is especially good at it in an easy, matter-of-fact way that never overwhelms her. He's sweet.
She reaches for his hand again, squeezing tight, affection and fading surprise mingling.]
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no subject
I had to.
[ there's a pause when he realizes that he should probably expand on that. at that time, he had no other choice: evolve or die, break free or let everyone down, in his eyes, he couldn't not. it was everything up until that point, including his connections to all the people who had helped him despite his situation.
it takes him a moment to word it properly. ]
... Other people I knew gave me that power, they believed in me. If I didn't, the God of Control would've remade the world how he wanted. It was then or never.
[ there was no second chance. ]
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...You're really brave, you know that?
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People like you make me brave. We're in this together, we have to take care of each other.
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She reaches for his hand again, squeezing tight, affection and fading surprise mingling.]
You're such a sap.
no subject
[ but there's even fondness in that. he takes all too much pride in Akechi's half-baked insults. ]
That's how you know that those memories matter, even when you can't remember them. It's because we're connected.