evocation | ⚡ hadriel

[Even with healing magic, recovering from broken ribs is frustrating and painful. He can move if he's careful, but training is out of the question and his hands are shaky when he paints. Each line has to be deliberate, carefully done and redone, and what are supposed to be simple sketches end up taking him several hours.

It doesn't matter. It was his fault anyway, and this is how it ends.

Apologize, Drake said. Mean it.

Kyna doesn't want to hear anything he has to say, Ephemera knows, but he wants to be better. So he tries something new.

He has a small sketch folded in half, one that he worked on for most of the morning. It's the first time he saw Kyna and really looked at her, when she was standing in the doorway and looking at Washington. There was something open in her expression then. Hopeful in some ways. Careful in others. And then there'd been Washington, standing there, watching her.

Really looking at her. Even with his armor on, it was impossible to miss.

Ephemera doesn't sign the sketch. He never does. He folds it in half and stick it in the crack of her door. Hopes that it'll mean something, in the end.

He doesn't intend to say anything to Kyna, or see her at all, but she rounds the corner just as he's about to leave.

Oh.

Ephemera steps back quickly. Don't get in a fight. Don't start anything, you promised.]

[Kyna only comes back to her apartment at all to pick up some things, because Wash wants her to stay with him. She doesn't really think it's necessary, because she doesn't think Ephemera is going to hunt her down or whatever, but that thought is cut short when she rounds the corner and sees Ephemera sitting something into her door.]

Dude, come on.

[He steps back, and she frowns, crossing her arms over her chest, which causes her ribs to twinge in protest. She's already sick of this.]

I thought we were clear. What are you doing?

[Actually, she can just find out for herself. She eyes him for a second, then heads to the door to pluck the paper out.]

[Ephemera backs up another step, watching her. Don't say a word. Don't get into a fight, you're supposed to be responsible and you have people. Don't fuck it up.

He doesn't say a word.]

[Kyna opens up the folded paper, still watching him for a second before glancing down.

Oh.

She's seen his sketches before, courtesy of Wash, so she's knows he's the one who's drawn it, she just can't wrap her head around why. And he took the time to draw Wash, even though he hates him. It's from when they first had that awkward run in, she thinks, before she noticed Ephemera was there. Kyna looks up at him, utterly confused.]

Why are you... What is this?

[She looks at the sketch. Looks at him.

Ephemera holds perfectly still.]

Apology.

[If she wants it. It ought to mean more than anything he might say.]

This doesn't unbreak my ribs.

[But she's not tossing it or shoving it back at him. In fact, she's just sort of watching him. It doesn't fix anything, but deep down she knows she didn't back down when she should have, too. She's self-aware about flaw of hers. Tucker and Harlan have rubbed her nose in it enough.]

No.

[Ephemera doesn't expect it to. He fucked up, hurt her. That's on him.]

I'll go.

I still think you're a dick.

[Nothing can be easy with Kyna, apparently.]

But this shit is fucking exhausting. I don't want it to be a thing.

[Ephemera supposes he deserves that.]

What do you want?

God, I don't know.

[She doesn't have experience with this kind of thing. When people hold grudges against her, it isn't this long standing, deep seated hatred, it's an "I'm going to kidnap your whole crew and probably try to kill you" thing. At least that's winnable. This just seems exhausting and endless.]

You seriously hate him, don't you?

He took my family from me.

[This time, Ephemera doesn't yell or curse. He sounds tired more than anything.]

Wouldn't you?

[If it were Tucker and Harlan, she would, absolutely. No question. But she doesn't want to consider that. She folds the paper closed again, shaking her head, but there's nothing she can say to that.]

[Ephemera just sighs.]

I miss them. More than anything.

[Sometimes it hurts so much he can't imagine feeling anything but the loss of them.]

But I can't get them back, no matter what I do to him.

It's not like he did that for fun.

[She really, really does not want to talk about this.]

He still did it.

[Ephemera smiles. Knows it's a bitter expression. He's tired and he hurts.]

I can't, okay? You're going to defend him and I'll--it'll go wrong.

[Kyna just stares at him for a moment, incredulous. This isn't what she was expecting. Wash said Ephemera meant his apology, and Drake said he was trying to change, and... She doesn't know how to handle this. Yelling at him is so much easier.]

Why do you care if it goes wrong?

You seem okay.

[Strange as it is to say that.]

And I don't want to be angry all the time.

I seem okay? Then why are you so into trying to piss me off?

[Ephemera just looks at her. Isn't it obvious?]

You defended him.

[She rolls her eyes.]

Are you serious?

[This time, Ephemera doesn't snap at her. He just shakes his head. This is pointless.]

I should go. I won't bother you again.

Jesus. Listen. How do I know you're not gonna try something again? Or get pissed off that I'm hanging around with Wash or something?

[Ephemera gives her a faint smile.]

It's simple. I fuck with you, he kills Drake.

[Kyna's mouth twists. She wants to tell him that Wash wouldn't, out of an instinctive attempt to defend him, but... Wash said he needs Ephemera to think he'd hurt Drake, so she doesn't.]

Drake said you're... trying to change or something. Not being a dick just because someone's threatening you isn't changing.

We don't always get what we want.

[And it's not like she'd believe him, anyway. Ephemera wouldn't, if their situations were reversed.]

I won't let him get hurt. You can believe that.

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