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[evocation]

@kyna.medina | ■ ▲ ◌ ▼

Comments

[preseance]

Could be.

（ you give a man ten years an' a whole other life as a serial dater an' maybe he learns a thing or two about a thing or two. ）

I'm pure as the driven snow, thank you.

[evocation]

yeah right
if we're talking about nyc snow, maybe

[preseance]

I've lived long enough in New York to be offended by that.

[evocation]

good
anyway
you're super charming and your accent is adorable
but are you okay?
seriously

[preseance]

Yeah. Had a pretty easy time of it in the Aerie, all things considered.

Could've been a lot worse.

Are you okay?

[evocation]

uh
to be honest
not really
wait
are you doing that thing where you ask me how i'm doing so you don't have to talk about how you're doing?

[preseance]

Kyna, I'm a man that went to war being able to see and speak to the dead. If you think I'm all that rattled by seeing folks kill each other in Gladiatorial combat you've got another thing coming. I won't deny I'm a little on edge because I reckon ain't a one of us ain't about living a whole other life — but if not for the fact I wouldn't give my brothers up for anything, life was actually better for me in the Aerie.

Now, you wanna talk about it?

[evocation]

oh
okay
um, sure
i mean, if you're sure

[Eloquence.]

[preseance]

Wouldn't have asked if I wasn't, K. We ain't got much else but ourselves when it comes to holding each other up outta the mud.

[evocation]

yeah
i know
i'm not used to seeing so many people dying
so it's hard to shake

[preseance]

I'd say that's more good than bad, honestly.

（ which sounds hypocritical comin' from him, so after a moment his expression twists an' he shakes his head to continue — ）

For me, I've talked to the dead since I was knee high to a grasshopper. It's part of my life, but it meant that death never held no great mystery for me, and no especial fear. But other folks don't have that foreknowledge, and death — it ought to be something you don't get desensitized to. It should hurt every time. It's when you get too used to it you ought to worry.

So don't give yourself a hard time about it, yeah? Everyone is going to need space to grieve and come to terms with everything that happened. Hell, there ain't exactly a precedent in psychology for what we're doing here, literally experiencing death and then walking away from it with near as no repercussions except in the mind. Folks are sometimes tempted to forget it's a critical organ too, with its own species of hurt.

[evocation]

i'm trying not to give myself a hard time about it
i just don't know what to do with it
and i had to kill someone too, and
i don't know
i'm worried about everyone coming back but i don't know how to work though this shit myself either
sorry
i'm just totally unloading on you
i guess i'm just sick of getting fucked with, and it's been happening a lot lately

[preseance]

Hey, I asked. It's all right.

What else's been going on?

[evocation]

you mean before this?
the riverstone shit, and that time a bunch of us got kidnapped
we keep getting forced into these impossible situations

[preseance]

If they were impossible they wouldn't happen.

All we can do is deal with them once we're in the thick of it.

I think you're doing all right, everything considered. Lord knows it's a lot.

[evocation]

thanks
but i'm sick of just reacting to everything once it's already happening and already a shitshow
i think ren's right
we need to be more proactive

[preseance]

Could be.

But some folks aren't going to want to do that, and that's fine too.

We'd all get along a lot better if everyone accepted people aren't gonna move in the same directions at the same times.

[evocation]

i'm not interested in pushing anyone to do anything
if some people want to hang back, fine
i just can't do it anymore

[preseance]

I've been thinking we ought to try and find the Gold god. If the monsters have something to do with Grey, could be it's in something of a precarious position itself.

Doubt we want a repeat of what happened with Blue, given all of us being here.

[evocation]

that's a good idea
remember those dreams we had before the monster attack? maybe that was some kind of connection with gold
like gold was reaching out to us, or we were sensing them without realizing it
i think if we really dug down into figuring out our powers, a lot of this stuff would fall into place more easily

[preseance]

Reckon you're the expert in that department. What do you propose?

[evocation]

well, back home i had a leg up because i had people to teach me, you know?
here it's going to be a lot of trial and error and practice
but our powers seem really melded with us, like they play off of our personalities and pasts
all the shared dreams i've been in have been really
intimate, you know? people's hopes or fears or memories
the empathy bond and memory sharing is the same, and a lot of people think our powers represent us
so i think we have to trust ourselves and try to work with them as intuitively as possible
and i think connecting with each other might help, too
a lot of what we can already do relies on that, right?

[preseance]

Guess if we've got a piece of this creature in all of us, it makes sense they'd have a yen for each other just the same.

Could be they could teach us, too. If we can find one of the others.

[evocation]

maybe they could
sam and i were going to try to dig into that stuff more
winchester, i mean, when he gets back
if he's okay

[preseance]

That's Dean's brother, yeah?

If he's half so tough as the elder of the two, I assure you he'll be right as rain.

（ dean's had a traumatic life. stands to reason sam was there for some of that, and you build... callouses, almost, against it. dean shrugged off dying a hell of a lot easier than he shrugged off what lead to it, anyhow. ）